How important are parents in determining their children’s lives?
How important are parent's in determining the lives that their children have? Short answer: So far more influential than anything else in their lives that many may find it frightening.
It starts with the genetics passed on by each of the parents that will create the physical and physiological blueprint of their baby. We are now aware that the physical condition of the parents at conception has its own impact. It is also incredibly important the conditions that the newly conceived child encounters in-utero. The mother’s health, diet and stress levels all play a part. Even the external environment outside the womb can have an influence on the child that may not be apparent for some years.
The ease of birth then plays its part and, once born, the child will become the product of everything that they experience from that time on. The human mind is incredibly complex. From very early on its development will be influenced not only by what the child experiences but, critically, how the child perceives what they experience. Perception all happens within the child’s mind so it is impossible to completely control.
However, we now know so much about what experiences have a positive effect on a child’s psyche and development that we can go a long, long way towards ensuring that our child has the best chance of fulfilling their potential and living a happy, healthy life that gives them great satisfaction.
Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs is still accepted as providing the framework of the fundamentals required to ultimately be the best version of ourselves. It starts with having our physiological needs met and feeling safe and secure and moves quickly to needing to be loved and having a sense of belonging. Those necessities all being well met create a mental space in which all of the things that contribute to being a well-rounded human can flourish. As a result, it is likely that we will want to do whatever we can to give ourselves the rich and rewarding life that we know we deserve.
Parents are fundamentally responsible for meeting the needs just described. People may point to other family members, friends and their schooling as being hugely important. They all play their part, but the child almost always is most reliant on their parents to provide the fundamental necessities of life. They are the caregivers, the closest contacts and the supports in the critical formative years of life.
The upshot is very clear. Like it or not, if your child is kicking goals in life, take a bow, you are primarily responsible for that. If they are not you, and only you, are best placed to change it.